So You Want to Breastfeed in Ireland?

This week the Irish Parenting Bloggers are doing a blog march for World Breastfeeding Week.  There have been some amazing posts so far and I encourage you to browse!

So you want to breastfeed in Ireland, eh?  Well here are some home truths from some one who's been there and done that despite being one of the less than 1% who cannot physically breastfeed. 

First thing you need to know and probably won't like to hear.... the system and culture is set up so you are almost destined to fail.  What do I mean by this?  I mean that support in the medical system is scant at best and when it's there you have to actively seek it out.  Nine out of ten times your PHN, GP, Midwife and even some hospital lactation consultants are probably not up to date on breastfeeding best practice and advice. I find that at the first sign of trouble they are wont to offer a bottle as a solution.

This does not stop with the medical profession. Our closest support -partners, mothers, the dreaded-mother-in-law, friends, sisters, cousins - are often wont to offer similar advice.  When you have a baby, every one has an opinion and though usually well meant, these opinions can be anything but helpful.  Sylda discusses some all too familiar scenarios in her post this week. Most of our mothers and mothers-in-laws did not breastfeed.  Any attempt you have to do things differently is often met with "sure didn't you/partner turn out grand?" and the misguided assumption that because you are choosing to do something differently from them, you are disparaging the choices they made. Our culture is obsessed with babies being "good" and people are genuinely not familiar with how a biologically normal (i.e. breastfed) baby behaves. Even on my third child on the dreaded day three my own mother kept saying things like "Is that baby feeding AGAIN!?" *sigh*

So if you really want to breastfeed, how do you get around this classic Irish setup for failure?  I spoke with some of the amazingly knowledgeable and experienced women on the Extended Breastfeeding Ireland Facebook Group to get some advice and ideas! 

1. Do your research!

When you decide you want to breastfeed, research ahead of time.  The usual pregnancy books tend to just gloss over breastfeeding, with some of them subtly undermining it.  Learn about the realities of what to expect.  Many Irish women give up in the first two weeks, because they truly are the hardest.  Breastfed newborns feed a LOT! People are not used to this and will give you bad advice.  Breastfed babies will also lose a lot more weight after they're born. This can also be added to if you receive fluids during labour. Medical professionals tend to freak out when they see this weight loss or jaundice and immediately advise supplementation.  Supplementation this early will really hurt your supply and overall journey, so you need to research ahead of time and have a plan in place for if and when this happens.  Get yourself a copy of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.  It's published by La Leche League and is a phenomenal resource.  Get it ahead of time and read all about the early days and what to expect. Keep it for when after the baby is born as you will refer to it many times.  Most Irish libraries have a copy.  Jack Newman's book is also an excellent resource, especially if you run into problems.  His online handouts are exceptional as well. Familiarise yourself with all this information.  Kellymom is a fantastic online resource that will tackle any myths you might encounter or problems that might occur.  Read read read.... have realistic expectations and try to find out about other Irish women's experiences and how they dealt with and overcame problems both physical and with the system.

2. Get Support in Advance

I cannot stress this one enough. Go to a breastfeeding group before baby is born!  Please, if you do nothing else on this list, this one could make or break it for you.  I always thought these meetings would be full of hippies and "breastapo", but guess what, they are all just normal mammies like you doing their best.  The advice, support and camraderie received in these groups is second to none, but most importantly if you go to a few meetings in advance you will have a built in support group when baby comes along.  On my second daughter the PHN was telling me to do things that didn't sound right and I rang up one of the leaders from the group I'd been going to for advice.  She was over to my house within an hour popping the kettle on and helping me with latching, sending me to bed with Ciara and watching Ella while we nursed.  Amazing!  Not to say they will all be like this, but those first few weeks are fraught with emotions and hormones and even when you are well read and think you are well prepared sometimes the pressure from a PHN  or GP can have you doubting yourself.  A phone call to someone who has been where you are is often enough to give you the confidence and wherewithal to carry on. The meetings are informative and fun and can be a great way to make friends, especially if you are (or will be) a new Mum.  If you can't get out, find a local group on Facebook or join the absolutely phenomenal EBI group, the women of which seem to be able to help with just about anything and most importantly give you the reassurance that what you are facing is normal and fixable!

3. Educate and inform your family

If you are planning on breastfeeding it is imperative that you inform and educate your family and close support.  You need to prepare your partner especially well.  Let them know realistically that you will be out of commission for a few weeks while you establish breastfeeding. Let them know that you will need help - emotional, practical and physical. Let them know what to expect, that breastfed babies feed often in the first few weeks and that sleeping through the night is not a goal. Make sure your partner is aware of your preferences for birth as well. If you do end up in a situation where you cannot speak for yourself, he/she needs to be able to be your voice.  If you want to breastfeed they need to be able to advocate on your behalf. They should be aware of the various arguments medical professionals might use to support supplementing and be able to counter them, if so desired. Talk to your Mum/Mother-in-law about breastfeeding.  Maybe you'll be lucky and find out they did it and support you, but if not, make sure you tell them that their support is imperative and suggesting bottles or routines will not help.  Keep them busy with other methods of helping such as laundry, cleaning and cooking meals. Mums love to feel useful, make it happen!  Make sure your partner is on board here too, if his/her Mum is talking to them on the sly or trying to tell them you are doing things wrong, it can often reverberate back to you and have an impact on your relationship and emotions. Make sure they know where you stand and are on the same page.

4. Assume you can do it!

This one came up a few times on EBI.  Assume you can do it.  This is what your boobs are made for! Very few people cannot physically breastfeed (I should know, I am one), yet many seem to think they can't due to poor education and bad advice.  There are very few breastfeeding problems that can't be fixed with a bit of education and knowledge and a good lactation consultant (note: the hospital ones are not necessarily the best - if needed, I would recommend seeking out a private one, fees can generally be claimed back through insurance.)  Don't listen to negative stories and keep in mind that the majority of people who say they couldn't breastfeed or didn't make enough milk are most likely misinformed and received bad advice, a classic system failure.

5. Follow your instinct

The best advice I can give any parent is to go with your gut.  If it feels right, do it, naysayers be damned. If someone gives you advice, even a GP or PHN and it doesn't feel right, get a second opinion.  If a routine feels right for you, go for it, if you want to carry your baby, go for it, if you prefer a buggy, go for it.  Don't let anyone tell you what's right for you.  Listen to your baby, listen to your heart and you will find the right path.  Some people are of the persuasion that if you breastfeed you must co-sleep, baby-led wean, baby wear, cloth nappy etc etc.  That's not the case. It's not an all inclusive lifestyle. Mothers from all walks of life and all forms of parenting backgrounds breastfeed, which is precisely why I love the diverse support meetings so much.    Do what is right for you, end of story!

6. Don't feel guilty

One of the wisest things my mother ever told me was that no one else can make you feel guilty.  Guilt is a choice, a choice that brings you and people around you down. If you did the best you could, then so be it. Accept that and don't feel bad, be happy with what you achieved and be happy for other mama's who achieved differently. If you do feel guilty - examine why - don't let it hamper you. You are an amazing mama and whether you lasted a day, a week, a month or a year, every single drop made a difference to your baby and you. Don't assume that just because you see or hear someone promoting breastfeeding that they are judging or undermining your decision to wean early or not even start, because as a self-proclaimed "lactivist" I can assure you, we are not.  What works for one mum may not for another and the most important thing is that you do what is best for YOU and your baby!

What other pieces of advice would you add? I'd love to hear from you in the comments!

This post is part of the Irish Parenting Bloggers BlogMarch in support of World Breastfeeding Week running from 1st to 7th August 2013. You can read more about World Breastfeeding Week 2013 here. 

The Irish Parenting Bloggers’ focus is on community support, particularly in the form of peer-to-peer support and the BlogMarch features our varied breastfeeding experiences, including our experiences with breastfeeding support in Ireland. The full list of posts is available on mama.ie here.

Places to earn money or vouchers online

Pardon the recent hiatus, had lots of stuff to deal with IRL. Been a rough couple of months, but life goes on.  


Was discussing making money online with some other Mammies recently and agreed to come up with a list and some suggestions. All of these are free to sign up for and have no investment as far as I'm aware. I have tried them all at one point or another and still use many. I know there are some other cashback sites, but as far as I know they all use tradedoubler (i.e. they all have the same merchants due to the third party they use to track the affiliate sales) so you get more or less the same benefits from each site and because of browser cookies can only use one at a time per shopping transaction, so I just stick to Fatcheese as I've never had any issue with them.  So for those of you wishing to make a few bob with little effort, hopefully this will help!

Here's what I've got so far. What am I missing? I will edit to add as suggested! 

Volunteer for Panels - A place to sign up for a variety of internet panels, they will contact you when a suitable vacancy is available.

Irish Opinions - Earn money for taking surveys, paid in vouchers.

Toluna - Earn points by completing surveys, participating in polls and their community. Redeemable for vouchers.

RedC - The survey company, earn points for surveys, cash in for vouchers. Probably the more interesting surveys, often political as well as marketing.

MySurvey - Another survey company, earn points and cash in for vouchers.

Fatcheese - Cashback on many popular internet shopping outlets. Great if you buy Groupon or Pigsback deals as well as bigger purchases, Apple and Dell come to mind.

Europinions - Another survey company, earn points and cash in for vouchers.

Gapbuster A secret shopping company. Secret shop for McDonalds, KFC, Pizza Hut, Texaco etc. All training is online and easy to pass, payments are swift and I've had no problems, other than the extra calories! 

Pigsback - Earn points by clicking on ads, completing offers and shopping. Redeemable in vouchers.

Catalyst - Another secret shopping company. I've done shops for Smyths, An Post and Vodafone. Quite straightforward and decent payment, the Smyths ones also reimburse you for a toy you can keep.

Swagbucks - US based, but becoming more EU friendly, can cash in points for Amazon UK. Earn by completing offers, watching videos, taking surveys, polls and using their search function. Current offer: Use code HOLIDAYSWAG to get an extra 70 points when you join.
Shop and Scan - Scan your groceries with a scanner when you get home. A bit time consuming, but points earned can be redeemed for high street vouchers.

Opinion World - Another survey site, earn points, exchange for vouchers.

WhoseView - Write reviews of local companies and earn points, cash them in for vouchers. Seems to be only major cities for now.

MenuPages - Write reviews of restaurants and earn points, cash in for restaurant vouchers and coupons. Can review all over the country, but unfortunately cash-in offers appear to be mainly Dublin/Cork.



*Disclaimer - one or two of the above links are my personal referral ones, feel free to use or disregard as you see fit. 

Homemade Laundry Detergent

Both my girls have eczema on their arms and I have tried literally everything to get rid of it. From over the counter creams to prescription cortisone and steroids and nothing seems to help.

Recently I began thinking about other causes and decided a simpler more natural laundry soap might help.

The following is my recipe for homemade detergent. It's incredibly frugal, making enough for 160 loads and working out at less than three cent a load. Beat that Proctor and Gamble!!! You can customise it to suit your water and sense of smell. I like lavender and find it relaxes the small people, so I went with that.  You could also add a few drops of tea tree oil for it's disinfectant properties.

Borax can be bought at most chemists and if they don't have it in stock, they will order it for you. I got the soda crystals at Tesco and the soap at Dunnes. This is very effective and gets stains out easily. Use a little extra soda if you have hard water and continue to use whatever softening technique you already use, like Calgon.

Ingredients:

• 3oz laundry/castile soap, approx half a bar (i.e. Ivory, Fels Naptha, Fairy, Dr. Bronners)
• 3/4 cup borax
• 3/4 cup washing soda
• 9L hot water
• 10-15 drops essential oil

Grate the soap into a metal bowl.

Bring one litre of the water to a boil on the stove and add the grated soap, stirring until dissolved.  Add essential oil to scent.  Remove from heat and add the soda and borax.

Stir until combined, it will thicken.  Pour into a ten litre container* and add the remaining eight litres of hot water.  Stir vigorously until well mixed.

Allow the mixture to sit overnight and it will thicken slightly.  

Use 2 fluid ounces (1/4 cup) per load of laundry, more for extra soiling.  

* I asked at the local shop for one of those big mayonnaise buckets they use at the deli!

10 Tips to a Tastier and More Efficient Kitchen

I, for one, am sick and tired of notable chefs and cooks selling out and buying into the whole “30 minute meal” phenomenon. I cook 98% of my food from scratch and it rarely takes me more than 30 minutes to prepare a meal, usually much less. I am of the persuasion that you should not substitute quality to get something on the table quicker.

So instead of bringing you ten ways to save time in the kitchen I am bring you a list of simple changes you can make in your kitchen to ensure fresher, more efficient and better tasting food whilst making the kitchen a more enjoyable place. Ultimately some of them will save you time and money, but taste wise you won’t sacrifice a thing!

1) Use fresh herbs.

Photo owned by Nikki L. (cc)

Most recipes require seasoning of some sort and if not, adding some can make quite a difference. Even if you insist on making casseroles with canned soup adding a pinch of fresh chopped thyme brings it to a different level. Most supermarkets carry fresh herbs these days, but it’s also very easy to grow a small herb garden on your kitchen window.

Currently I have basil, parsley, thyme, oregano, chives, bay leaves and flat-leaf parsley growing. I would have coriander as well, but I always kill it! If you don’t have green fingers, like me, I suggest buying the plants already grown. I love just being able to snip a bit here or there and really enhance my cooking. Before growing them myself I would make sure to always have parsley in my fridge and usually a bit of basil too. Ultimately, growing your own will save you money and time. I am not opposed to dry herbs, except for the extremely tasteless parsley, but fresh makes such a taste difference.

2) Grate your own cheese.

Seriously. This takes maybe thirty seconds longer, but the taste difference is unbeatable. Pre-shredded cheese usually has a flour or starch coating added to it, to separate the pieces. You can often buy one block of cheese for the same price as 3-4 bags of an equal amount of grated cheese. Yes, it will take you a little longer to grate your own, but it’s cheaper, tastier and just plain cheese!

3) Buy free-range eggs

As someone on a budget I often have to make concessions and pass up on the lovely organic food I long to buy. However, one thing I will not concede on is eggs. I know battery chickens have a terrible life, but that in itself is not why I choose free-range. I truly believe they have a superior taste and texture. If you don’t believe me, buy a battery egg and a free-range egg. Crack them both and look at the color difference. The free range will have a lovely yellow yolk and a nice thick white. Now fry them up. Add a little salt. Which tastes better? Honestly now! It is worth the small price difference even in baking.  Be warned that organic eggs are not necessarily free-range.  It just means they are fed organic feed.


4) Get a good knife.

Photo owned by jwalsh (cc)

Yes I did say a knife. If you can afford it and want the whole set, don’t let me stop you, but really all you need is a decent chef’s knife. Some brands to look out for include Wusthof, Global, Sai and Henckel.Personally I love Global as they are contemporary looking and weighted. Chefs knives come in all sizes, so pick one that works for you. Personally I don’t like a big blade and use a 6.5 inch Wusthof knife.

Keep your knife sharp. I give mine a little love every day before using it. Just a few swipes on a steel. If it cuts through a tomato without any pressure you’re all set. Take care of your knife. Never put it in the dishwasher.

Learn how to use it. You don’t need to go to culinary school to have good knife skills. Just buy some cheap vegetables like onions or cabbage and start practicing, it’s all in the wrist. You can even watch some videos here. Ultimately you will save so much time with a good knife and it’s a lot less dangerous than a blunt or poor quality knife. Easy and fun!

5) A stick (immersion) blender is all you really need.

From someone who at one point had everything BUT a stick blender, take it from me, these babies rock! I used to have a beautiful Kitchen Aid (sniff) and a fabulous Cuisinart food processor as well as various other chopping gadgets back in the US. Now I have a stick blender. It chops, it whisks, it purees, it makes smoothies - it rules! I do have a very nice food processor, but I rarely get it out as the stick blender is sufficient for nearly everything I do and a big time saver in terms of the hassle in getting the processor out and put together and then cleaned up again. Now having said all that, if my US KitchenAid worked here in Ireland, I would take it back in a flash, but mainly for the dough hook.

6) Use real garlic.

I know how easy it is to buy the jar of already minced stuff, but don’t, compared to the real stuff it is NASTY! Same goes for ginger. Use the real deal and grate it. And lemon juice too. Buy the lemon. Please.

If you have a garlic press it will take you just as long to crush a clove as it would to open a jar and spoon some garlic flavored goop out. And for goodness sakes, no garlic powder in place of fresh garlic in a recipe ok???

I use my chef's knife to chop my garlic and I keep promising myself a garlic press, so it takes me a good bit longer than using the jar, but if you have a press or other handy garlic chopper you’ve no excuse! Use some caution with fresh garlic. I never trust a recipe that has me add garlic at the same time as the onions. Garlic burns and turns bitter SO easily and burnt or bitter garlic is horrible. I usually sauté onions first and add the garlic for a minute at the end and then follow the recipe as written.

7) Use good chocolate.

Photo owned by EverJean (cc)

If you enjoy baking, try not to skimp on chocolate. I used to pass on the organic cocoa powder, but I have yet to find anything remotely comparable. It is top notch and makes your brownies SO much better. I also always have some high quality chocolate bars on hand. This means at least 70% cocoa solids. My favorite at the moment is the Lindt 80% bar or mad Willy’s 100% bar.

8) No substitute for real butter

If your health will allow it, when a recipe calls for butter, use butter. If a recipe calls for margarine, use butter. Forget the fat, it’s just milk, whereas that other stuff is full of chemicals and tastes dreadful. I’d rather cut back on butter than spray my food with chemicals.

A little butter goes a long way. I would love to sauté everything in butter, but to cut down on saturated fat I usually use extra virgin olive oil and toss in a sliver of butter to get the taste I crave. Add a sliver of butter to cooked sauces for a velvety finish. If you are in the US and can afford the occasional treat, I strongly recommend that you buy a European butter, as the taste and color are far superior. I used to buy the French President butter when we lived over there, but you can now get our own lovely Irish butter here!

9) Alliums are your friend.

Photo owned by John-Morgan (cc)

Onions, shallots, scallions, leeks, chives and garlic are essential in cooking. No matter how much you think you hate them, I can guarantee you that all your favorite restaurant foods are full of them. Most soup bases are full of onions and would be tasteless without them. 

Try sauteing a few diced shallots before making your normal béchamel or risotto. It adds such a wonderful dimension. Shallots are my favorite in the allium family as they add an almost wine-like presence to food. Leeks are another wonderful vegetable. Just sautéed in a little butter they make the most wonderful accompaniment to any dinner. If you don’t like the strong taste of onions, then leeks might be for you. I use alliums in everything. If I looked at my most frequently purchased grocery, onions would top milk or bread!

10) Try baking your own bread.

I used to be terrified of yeast breads, but now I love them. There is something so incredibly satisfying about kneading your own bread and after awhile it becomes instinctive. If you haven't tried Artisan Bread in Five Minutes yet, you are missing out.  Truly delectable bakery quality bread from your home oven with no kneading or hard work needed.  I make a loaf or rolls every single day and people are always amazed at my bread.  It's so simple and incredibly cheap.  A rustic loaf costs me a few cents to make. 

This is a post I wrote a few years ago on my old blog and for Blissfully Domestic, it has been updated.